People are starting to become more aware of the pitfalls and dangers of marriage counseling. I personally cannot think of a more misleading group of so-called professionals. Just the other day I met an individual who told me the marriage counselor she and her husband were seeing was wonderful. I was surprised and told her how unusual it was, from my experience, for marriage counselors to actually help marriages. She said “Oh, she wasn’t able to help us stay together, we’re getting divorced at the end of the week, but we really like her.” Fortunately for her family, which includes a precious four year old daughter, I was able to convince her their marriage was definitely worth saving.

There are some very good reasons to avoid marriage counselors.

Reason #1

I don’t know the statistics of how many people who are getting a divorce went through marriage counseling, but the most commonly accepted statistic for how many people get a divorce – and most of them have gone through marriage counseling – is scary enough. On the low end 70% of the people who have gone to marriage counseling get a divorce, on the high end it is well over 90%. That’s like bringing your car into an auto repair shop that repairs somewhere between %2 and 30% of the cars they work on; the rest of the cars end up in the junkyard. So it’s fair to say the number one reason to not get marriage counseling is because statistically it is a fraudulent profession that advertises benefits it cannot deliver.

Reason #2

Sometime statistics can be misleading. What is important to understand is where they come from. Sometimes they speak so loudly there is no need to look into their source. For instance the statistic regarding divorce rates among various professional groups. I found a statistic that I thought was pretty reliable because I was able to trace it back to a study. A psychiatrist is a medical Dr. who is trained in the fields of psychology. The following article reports that 51% of psychiatrists get a divorce.

From the John Hopkins Gazette

After decades of following 1,118 physicians who graduated from the Hopkins School of Medicine between 1948 and 1964, researchers found a 51 percent divorce rate for psychiatrists and 33 percent for surgeons, rates higher than those for internists (24 percent), pediatricians and pathologists (each 22 percent). The study revealed a 32 percent overall physician divorce rate.

The number two reason to not go to marriage counseling: Statistically they demonstrate the same capacity for remaining married as anyone else! Wouldn’t it be odd if an auto mechanic had to bring his car to the junkyard because he couldn’t get it running?

Reason #3

Everyone knows the story about the boy who stuck his finger in the dike and saved Holland. The counter moral to that story is if you don’t do something in time it gets much worse. But the accepted practice of marriage counseling includes regular meetings of 45 to 50 minutes for at least several months. As someone who has worked with people in crisis situations I can tell you absolutely 45 or 50 minutes is not enough time. My own sessions lasted two HOURS and I never scheduled anyone behind the people I worked with in case I needed another 15 or 20 minutes. What do these counselors think happens at the end of the session when one or both parties has just vented about their spouse? So here is the third and final reason to not get marriage counseling: So that you can avoid the increased grief caused by putting everything out on the table, when all it does is worsen the relationship.

God didn’t make marriage so complex that you need an expert to guide you every step of the way. However, due to the bizarreness of our current society, people don’t lead a natural life and don’t know what to do in most situations. The lessons I have written explain the principles and dynamics of marriage. When you read them everything will become very clear to you. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard people say or write that everything in the lessons seems like they already knew it before. In a nutshell Lessosn For A Happy Marriage is common sense sorted for the specific life of a married couple. Learn how to be married and enjoy the very best situation you will ever have. Now go ahead and tell your spouse, “I love you.”

Licensed marriage counseling Denver / Depression therapist & Life coach; 20+ years experience Metro Denver, Boulder, Broomfield, Louisville, Arvada, Thornton Westminster Golden Colorado.

Welcome seeking marriage counseling, therapy for depression, or life coaching, is a very personal undertaking, I’m glad you’ve chosen to work with me. I am committed to working with you to achieve your goals. I understand that at times like this it’s important to work with someone who understands your concerns and who is qualified to provide the skilled marriage counseling, depression therapy, or life coaching you desire. As a Licensed Professional Counselor, all of our discussions are under federal law, strictly confidential, this is to ensure your privacy and comfort. I have been providing successful marriage counseling and individual therapy for well over two decades, assisting couples and individuals to work through the issues that impact their happiness and quality of life.

The future doesn’t just happen, it is created. Our destiny is not in the stars, but in ourselves. We may need to follow in the wake of those who have gone before us, but what we do and where we go is ultimately up to us. Sometimes we learn the hard way that it doesn’t pay to get discouraged. Positive thinking is an intellectual choice, and by keeping our eyes focused on the light of optimism, we can restore faith in ourselves and stay clear of the shadows.

Because we are all individuals, and our marriages are unique to us, no two are exactly the same. As a result we are all in need of differing levels of care and intervention. Based on my years of experience as a professional counselor, I have developed four different marriage counseling programs, tailored to meet the differing needs that my clients face. First I have the 8 week marriage counseling program, which is ideal for moderate levels of stress an conflict, couples struggling with communication and intermittent significant fights. Next I have developed the 10 week marriage counseling program which is ideal for couples who are experiencing considerable levels of stress and conflict, poor communication, frequent fighting and threats of divorce. For couples experiencing relentless conflict, and stress the 12 week counseling program is a very good choice to restore harmony to your marriage / relationship. The 14 week elite marriage counseling program is ideal for marriages experiencing critical levels of stress and conflict, one in which the both of you are very committed to working things out but the constant conflict is unbearable. The right program for you and your marriage, can restore the harmony, respect and love the both of you once shared.

Sometimes our needs are much more personal and we are seeking counseling / therapy to improve ourselves and our life, and or career. For you I have developed four individual counseling, depression therapy / life coaching / executive coaching programs. First I have the 8 week depression counseling / therapy & life coaching program, which is ideal for individuals experiencing a rough time in their lives, and may be feeling depressed. It is a solution, present focused program, which is designed to help you understand the things that are happening in your life today, gain some new skills and tools and send you on your way. The second program is the 10 week depression counseling / therapy & life coaching program. It is for individuals seeking a more in depth exploration of their life circumstances. Through our discussions you will gain new perspective, tools and skills to deal more effectively with your unique life circumstances. The 12 week depression counseling / therapy & life coaching program is ideal for individuals looking for a strategic ally in life work and relationships. This program will afford you a unique opportunity to engage in an in depth exploration of your life situation, and background. Through our discussions you will learn many tools, develop and utilize these skills to achieve your goals in life, work and love. The 14 week depression counseling / therapy & life coaching program is ideal for individuals looking for a long term strategic ally in life work and relationships. This program will afford you not only the opportunity to explore and understand your life situations, but give you a tangible competitive edge allowing you to achieve your goals more gracefully and efficiently then ever before. Through our discussions you will learn many tools, develop and utilize these skills to achieve your goals in life, work and love.

Marriage Counseling, therapy for depression, or life coaching is an investment in yourself and/or your marriage. It seems that no one teaches us how to be an emotionally healthy person, or how to have a healthy marriage. Some of us seek out a coach, or a mentor, and when we do, we find that we have discovered something that we never knew existed. We find that being an emotionally healthy person or having a healthy marriage is not a mysterious or elusive thing that people only talk about. It’s real, and within your grasp. The time and energy you spend on yourself and your marriage is never wasted! Invest in yourself and your marriage!

There is hope.

Robert Whitman, Licensed Professional Counselor, MA, CAC III

Please visit my website at www.fivestarcounselingservices.com

Call 303.464.9192 to schedule your free 60 minute consultation!

There are many aspects in a couple’s life that may affect the marriage of two people. Things such as the physical issues, sex, emotional and financial difficulties may all add up to the crises that are felt by the whole family. However, as most of these problems are connected with lack of proper communication and understanding, most of the marital problems can still be mended though marriage counseling.



In times that you already doubt the strength of your relationship, it can be a good time to resort to marriage counseling services. This way, you will be able to find a way to solve your communication problems even if your relationship is in a state of difficulties. Through marriage counseling, you can save the relationship and your family. Also, you will be able to avoid the rigorous process of divorce and separation. Also, if you and your spouse is ready to face the problems that you have, the counselor can be the one to help you out in making the proper decisions. As a third party without any biases, and with added experience and knowledge in handling situations such as marital problems, the counselor can be the right person to help a couple better understand each other.



Marriage counseling generally is about two people trying to improve their relationship. Normally, the people that engage in this are those that are having difficulties in keeping their family together. The counselors are the ones that help out the couple in solving their problems and in laying out possible solutions to the problem. Having an argument can still be unavoidable during this time, but this can still be right for a marriage. As long as you are able to find a solution to your problem, a healthy conversation can be a help.



Having differences between the two individuals is one of the aspects that are tackled during marriage counseling. Each spouse would have to accept the attitude and actual state of the other person. This will be able to help the couple set their differences, strengths and weaknesses so that they can make use of the things that they have to improve their marriage and their family.



If you are thinking to engage in marriage counseling, you should make sure that the counselor that you will hire should be someone that you can trust. Also, he or she should be a licensed therapist that has enough experience in handling the situations that you have. You will be spending money for it so you should make sure that what you pay for is worth every penny that you spend. It is possible that through the process, you will be able to get the right decision for your relationship. It may take some time for the couple to understand their situation so this normally happens for many sessions. Thus, you should consider this as a long term decision and only engage with it when you are fully confident that both of the couples are ready and the counselor is also the right person for your situation.

At the foundation of any marriage and family is a core relationship. Relationships can be difficult for many people – particularly when they are not comfortable communicating their feelings, when they feel unsettled when others are upset with them and when there are kids involved. For them, when there are challenges in the marriage, marriage counseling is often the most effective way of recognizing and working through the difficulties.

With marriage counseling, both spouses are able to sit down, to talk and to have the chance to be heard. Therapists who specialize in marriage counseling will be there to facilitate the conversation, to ask questions, to encourage active listening and to help both spouses to more comfortably express the hurt, anger or frustration that they are experiencing.

Unfortunately, the emotional toll of a conversation or an event can be particularly high. Within relationships, the emotional strain is something that can build over time – especially when both parties involved have trouble discussing the way that they feel or the event that prompted the response.

In marriage counseling, however, many couples find that they are in a better position to open up and – more importantly – to feel heard by their spouse. While it can be uncomfortable to start talking, while hearing the details of what hurt a husband or a wife and while it can be difficult to talk about emotions or situations that are painful, having those conversations in the setting of marriage counseling can ease some of the strain.

Marriage counseling, while it can dramatically improve relationships, is not just a matter of meeting with someone who will “fix” the problem; marriage counseling is a process of improving communication and ultimately of uncovering past hurts so that they can be worked through. Despite the fact that these hurts have often been buried, despite the fact that sometimes the event that has caused the hurt may be long in the past, marriage counseling can serve to uncover the underlying issues and to work on rebuilding communication and trust as well as a strong foundation for moving the relationship forward.

In part, the reason that marriage counseling works in many relationships is simple: marriage counseling works because it helps couples to acknowledge the hurts and frustrations, to work through the anger and to communicate with one another. In part, marriage counseling works simply because it enables both parties to express themselves and to feel heard by one another.

Communication is often difficult – especially when both parties either believe that they are in the right or there is a sense of not wanting to hurt the other person in any way. In marriages, a lack of communication can have a number of negative effects on the relationship; marriage counseling can serve to repair the damage and to reopen the lines of communication.

With marriage counseling, what many couples discover is that the biggest problem that they have faced is a lack of communication that has led to a lack of trust. What they learn during marriage counseling is the ability to communicate – something that, over time, allows them to improve the relationship on the whole. acp13243546ch

You need to find what the keys to a successful marriage are; marriage counseling Indianapolis can show you how you can enjoy the blessings of a happy family. It takes a few steps to make your marriage satisfying, to make your dream come true. One of your great desires is to share your hopes, life and goals with your spouse. Your marriage can be blessed with children, this is the best and most fulfilling experience you can have.

Marriage counseling Indianapolis can show you how to have a happy marriage; what is missing and find the biblical foundations for a successful family. It is easier to raise good moral children in a happy family; marriage counseling Indianapolis is teaching you that children are a blessing. If you will deeply understand the spiritual significance of marriage and family, God’s instruction for marriage you will make true your deep desire to have a successful marriage and a happy family.

Healing family conflicts

Families can have problems; can be torn apart by illness, poor communication and stress. Marriage counseling Indianapolis helps family members patch strained relationships; if you need more love, self-expression and personal growth, ask for marriage therapy. It is not easy to make the first step, but it is useful. You are not alone; your problems can be solved, marriage counseling Indianapolis will bring you a happy marriage, it will be your compass along your journey for a successful family.

Marriage counseling Indianapolis can teach you how to solve the problems and make a successful relationship. If you have a solid, happy and successful family, marriage counseling Indianapolis will help you to move to the next level, to turn your problems into opportunities for development and success. You must try to replace what does not work with what works better. If you argue or fight over no important things, if you don’t talk about your problems, you may wonder if there is hope for your marriage.

You must search how to bring more love and trust into your family, forget your frustration, anger and sadness. If you ask for marriage counseling in Indianapolis, you will learn how to improve your communication skills, how to work together to resolve your marriage problems. You will learn also how to proactively work on saving or increasing your family.

If you feel misunderstood, deeply hurt or unhappy, you must ask for marital counseling as soon as possible; early marriage counseling is increasing your chances to have a happy marriage.

Couples living in Chicago and having troubles in their marriages can ask for marital counseling to some well known therapists. If a couple has a major problem, Chicago marriage counseling is really necessary. This is the most recommended route to rebuild a marriage, the way to find the problems and issues in a marriage in trouble.

You can believe that a therapist can go into your head and see and understand all your experiences; nobody but you knows what issues causes problems in your marriage. Chicago Marriage counseling is really necessary if partners don’t know what is causing their problems. Those problems can be lack of love, poor communication, and lack of trust or anger. Adultery is a frequent cause or problems, as well as illness. Marriages in crisis must prevent future problems and ask for therapy sessions at Chicago marriage counseling.

Marriage counseling prevents future problems

Therapist form Chicago marriage counseling will work hard with you to save your marriage, to find your problems root. Many problems exists, some new ones may appear in the future. Therapy in Chicago marriage counseling can take months or weeks, depending on the partners willing to make their marriage back on track. A good, committed counselor can help you to transform your marriage into a rewarding one. Chicago marriage counseling can show you the root of your problems and teach you new strategies to make great changes, even if you have emotional troubles now.

If the expectations from your marriage are not fulfilled, if you don’t have the marriage of your dreams, Chicago marriage counseling can change this situation, offer positive options. You will learn how to use new tools to improve your communication skills, to maintain a satisfying relationship and learn the essentials about it in short time.

Chicago marriage counseling offers powerful strategies to expand harmony and happiness in your family; you can find the solution for your issues and also earn more about the most important tools to use for your entire life. Committed therapists can see the main patterns in your relationship and teach you how to change things to have a great relationship. You can learn to work through the obstacles and have the happiness you truly deserve in your life.

Chicago marriage counseling can show you the key strategies to maintain a strong relationship, to face the present and future challenges. Therapists will fulfill their mission teaching you the appropriate tools to build the best relationship you can have.

With married life comes struggles and with those struggles comes the desperate attempts at finding a solution through problem solving tactics or going for marriage counseling. Once considered a last resort, marriage counseling is now the talk of the town and the best possible option for people who have lost the ability to communicate. These types of problems are common and many people are turning to marriage counseling to improve their relationships and get some much needed peace in their lives.

Many people from all walks of life think that they know what is best for individual marriages and that they are capable of offering advice to any and all couples. The truth of the matter is that each couple is different.

The struggles in marriage, while possibly retaining some common ground, are most often categorically unique to the personalities of the couple. While there are some instances in which a little marriage advice from a friend or family member can be extremely helpful, in most cases the notion of anyone being qualified to give marriage advice should be considered suspect.

For this reason, marriage counseling should be taken with a grain of salt. While there are certain cases in which an outside and objective opinion is absolutely detrimental to the prospect of saving a marriage, there are other instances in which the best advice is to learn with one another as to how to solve the problems of a marriage from within.

Many people are far too apt to turn to outside help without actually testing the resolve of their communication first, leading to an inability to discuss and talk out one’s own problems. Talking to your partner should be the first consideration in terms of getting marriage advice, but many people completely discard the partnership aspect and treat their husband or wife more like a silent partner.

The most important thing to remember about marriage is that the foundation is built on communication. Without communication, even the greatest external advice through marriage counseling can end up being futile. Marriages will have conflicts, but it is important to realize that there are healthy ways to escape those conflicts and find the answers. While the foundation of a good relationship needs some conflict to survive, the methods of dealing with those conflicts is more important than anything else.

When considering marriage counseling, there are several questions to be asked about the nature of the relationship on the whole. If there are issues in terms of communication within the confines of a trusted relationship, how many more issues will result from taking an outside party and adding them to the situation?

Furthermore, if the parties are closed off to advice on issues such as pride or jealousy, how likely will marriage counseling be to solve any aspect of the relationship or its problems? These questions need answers before marriage counseling is considered by any couple.

Marriages are said to be made in heaven but there are times when these marriages need help. There is any number of marriage counselors who can help couples find ways to save their marriage. For Christian couples seeking help from Christian marriage counseling this is a way to preserve their marriage. These counselors have not just the experience of rescuing marriages but they have strong faith in the word of God.

For these Christian marriage counseling advisors the realness of marriage is one that is faced daily. They see many couples who start out with high hopes seeking help as their marriages dissolve around them. The counselors whose help is sought-after will try to help the couples, but the couples are the only ones who can make a marriage work.

Today marriages are faced with a wide variety of elements and these elements can often times distract or bring about disillusion. For those of the Christian faith, these distractions can test their belief system like nothing else can.

When seeking help many often times turn to their faith and look for help within the Chrisitian family. However, the same rules apply. When looking for help you want to be looking for someone who:

* You feel comfortable with (both you and your partner)

* Someone who you can confide in

* Someone who has a strong faith in the word of God

* Someone who has experience with marriage

In Christian marriage counseling, some of what is advised is:

* Understand you are two people sharing your lives together.

* Understand and remember you need to work together to make your marriage work.

* Road bumps or problems will arise, how you two as a couple handle the situation is of importance.

* Return to the bible and visit it’s teachings on marriage.

From the bible verses the couples will see exactly what marriage is termed as and what their responsibilities to the union are. The Christian marriage counseling will help the couple talk about the problems in their lives and find ways to work out these problems. One of the facts that could be discussed is how each person in the marriage regards the other. Things that could be discussed are:

* Do you respect each other

* What might be each others roles in any given situation

* How do you respond to your partners needs

Once a few of the problems have been talked about the counselor will be able to advise you on what steps you might want to take. You will be told that these steps are just the beginning suggestions. From these suggestions you will have the chance of seeing what else you can do to reopen your marriage. You will of course be advised to talk with each other.

And within this conversation a key element is to stay open and not take things personal. Know that both of you are trying to find a common solution that will work. To often individuals feel threatened and take a defensive stance, not really understanding why. Communication and openness are the keys to success.

By talking you will be able to see the point of view of your partner. This is an crucial aspect that can work. In your Christian marriage counseling you will also be advised to try sociable activities where you work with others. Sometimes working on projects at your Christian church can help as you are closer to God.

While a divorce is not advocated in a Christian marriage it is becoming a reality. To help mend the cracks there is always trained professionals. From the advice you receive you have many avenues open to saving your marriage. Christian marriage counseling can help open the doors for a new origin for your marriage.

Remember, communicate to each other, reason things out and don’t take things personal. Trust in God and know he will always prevail. Keep your eyes open, for sometimes the message or answer never looks like what we expect to.

As life is very uncertain people look for ways to have good life. For many people this is found in a marriage. Sometimes these marriages will not work due to various problems between the couple. When this occurs the only solution my be marriage counseling. The individuals who work with these couples are fully trained. From a professional like these you can still find ways to make your marriage work.

From marriage counseling you will get advice about how you can mend your marriage. This beginning will work only if the couple agrees to talk with each other. Once this step has been established you can find out where your marital problems began. The next step in marriage counseling is to see how you can fix this problem.

The various avenues that are given in marriage counseling will help you see the best ways to make your marriage work. These are however only suggestions that your counselor can give. It is up to you and your spouse to make them a reality. Marriage counseling can also help you both to decide how you want to proceed with your marriage.

Since you are two different people sometimes this outside help can let you air your grievances. These grievances and the marital problems that have arisen because of them need to be talked about. This idea may sound like suicide to a marriage but it can also help.

Going to marriage counseling also has the advantage of letting someone else see what the strengths in your relationship are. Knowing theses strengths can help you both to work on making them even stronger. This will give you an incentive to making your relationship work.

There are times however when even marriage counseling will not work. At these times the counselors that you have seen can give you another type of help. This is the point where you need to work through your problems to find a peaceful end to your marriage. With the help of marriage counseling you will be able to make the necessary decisions about separating your lives.

Since most couples have invested almost their entire life to making a happy marriage the ending can be quite painful. To help both parties cope before the divorce the counseling that you receive will help yo to mend your relationship to a peaceful ending. Now this might not seem to be a good reason for continuing with your marriage counseling but there are benefits.

These benefits will include finding out about support groups. You have someone to help you find ways to rebuild your life. You can also get professional help to avoid making these same mistakes a second time around.

Often, there are many crucial questions that are being asked about marriage counseling, like this particular question “does marriage counseling work?” Lot of people try and approach marriage counselors, when they perceive that there is a real problem in their marriage. Couples who are undergoing and experiencing marital upheavals and problems need an immediate solution to their problem. It is estimated that as high as 20% of couples in the North American continent face severe marital discord and relationship problems. It is also estimated that hundreds of couples look for marriage counseling as an escape route to solve their problems. Does marriage counseling work in the real sense? Yes! To some extent it is providing good results!

Before you ask a dicey question like “Does marriage counseling work?” you shouldn’t wait too long to seek professional assistance. Here is an article that attempts to answer your questions regarding marriage counseling and its feasibility. It also provides you some useful insight on how marriage counseling work and how a counselor is chosen based on the past track record.

Does marriage counseling work? Yes, only when you choose a good marriage counselor, who has a great past record of mending troubled relationship. However, good counseling can be created with an active participation from both you and the counselors. Before trying to contact a marriage counselor, try to answer these questions:

Tip: Be honest how you answer these questions, as they can influence the outcome of marriage counseling.

• When did you marry? Was it an early age? What was the age of your spouse when married?

• What is the level of education that you and your spouse possess? Graduate or School level?

• What is your income level? Are you from a high income bracket?

• What is your working experience? Have you worked for a long time? Are you a jobless person? If yes, how long?

• Did you marry your spouse in an inter-faith marriage?

• When was the first discord detected? Was it really bad?

• Did your parents divorce and did you have a bad childhood, as a result of this incident?

• Do you criticize one another on a consistent basis? Do you quarrel with each other? Is it really serious?

• Are you withdrawn with your spouse? If yes, since how many days?

• Do you hate each other? Or is it just a contempt?

• How do you treat your children? Do you both mingle with your children?

• Do you still live together? Or have you rented out separate houses?

Once you answer all these questions, you need to make a neat list of answers, as these are the type of questions that will be asked by a marriage counselor. The success or failure of your marriage counseling depends entirely on the answers that are provided by you. Does marriage counseling work? Possibly Yes, Only, if you provide complete answers to all these probing questions. If you have answered in a negative to all the above questions, then you’re at a higher risk for divorce than those couples who have meaningful expectations of one another. So, you may need to rush to the nearest marriage counselor.

Does marriage counseling work? Though many experts still believe that marriage counseling is not as effective and result oriented as people think, it is estimated that more number of women have benefited from this exercise. However, experts also believe that marriage counseling does not work on a permanent basis. There is a solace however; if you seek help before the problems become worse and acute, you have good chances of saving your marriage. Marriage counseling is useful to those couples who are young and are still in love. It also works well on those couples, who are open to therapy and suggestions. Does marriage counseling work? The answer is still uncertain, with many unknowns and imponderables coming in the way of a mutually agreeable settlement

Please visit my website www.maryshawe.com to browse the resources I have gathered here for you and learn how they hold the secrets to turn your life around.If you’re particularly interested in marriage advice and counseling, then please click here to read more about “Secrets of Successful Marriage

I also recommend Save My Marriage Today! by Amy Waterman for additional help and guidance.