Pre Marriage Counseling » Marriage Problems

Three Steps To Improving Communication In Your Marriage

Carol Ann — Tue, 23 Mar 2010 08:16:59 +0000

The majority of all marriage problems are related to the lack of effective communication between spouses. Although if you were to ask each spouse separately how their communication skills are they would assure you that there is no problems. Unfortunately their spouses will have something very different to say.

A lack of communication, however, is actually something that can be resolved relatively simply and one of the best ways to resolve it is to set up communication rules. This means basically guidelines that will help improve the effectiveness of your communication as a couple.

1. Have A Speaking Stick- It is often helpful to have a speaking stick in the home when you need to have a conversation with your spouse and want to be sure that you are being heard and understood, as well as making sure your partner gets their chance to speak. When you utilize a speaking stick, only the person with the stick is allowed to speak and therefore you eliminate talking at the same time and not hearing what your partner is saying and vise versa.

3. Stay On Track With Your Conversation- A lot of times while a couple attempts to communicate they begin calling down additional events from their past. They have such a history together that one matter extends to another and therefore eventually back into a controversy. Dealing exclusively with one matter at a time could genuinely assist in centering the communicating to ensure that both spouses are on the same page.

3. Think Before You Speak- Attempt to not discuss issues instantly, as an alternative have a waiting period. Generally as something first comes about everybody can be a bit more defensive as well as roused. Making a special day and time to sit down and address issues for the week, serves as a more beneficial way to discuss situations. After a brief time has elapsed you’ll in all probability be better capable to converse about the issue without converting the communicating into a fired up confrontation.

Avoid marriage problems by looking at the advice on www.lightyourfire.com. It is a place where you can read advice and testimonies as well as purchase programs that are a form of in home marriage counseling.

What Makes For A Successful Marriage

Carol Ann — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 04:10:52 +0000

Although you can click on thousands of articles that will tell you all about marriage counselor, there are not so many clicks that will bring you to an article on how to have a successful marriage. Many feel that if there are no problems you will be fine, but when a problem does arise they need to work extra hard at fixing it. Why not start working on your marriage now? Having a successful marriage is a simple task, just by following the ABC’s of marriage outlined below.

A- It is important to treat each other with respect ALWAYS. One of the most important aspects of any marriage is love, however if you do not add respect and kindness into the mix, love will not be enough. Without respect for one another you will find that their will be a breakdown in communication and your marriage may begin collapse. Respect is the structure of all marriages, and without it there is not a marriage that can strive.

B- It is simple for two people to have sex, it is done all the time. However, it is not simple to BE someones friend, and this is what you want to be for your spouse. Your spouse must be your best friend, and someone that you tell your deepest desires and secrets to. You want to be able to have a feeling of trust and security with your spouse, as this is the major component to have a long and happy marriage.

C- Always be willing to CARRY your spouse up the difficult hills of life, as well as being willing to allow your spouse to carry your at your times of need. Everyone faces a personal tragedy in their life and during those times it is important to have someone that is strong for them.

S- Remember that your marriage is a SACRED union and should always be in the forefront of your life. You need to treat your marriage like it is special and a unique relationship that will ensure your happiness together for the rest of your life.

If you are experiencing marriage problems, check out www.lightyourfire.com immediately. We will help you avoid divorce, and and remove the need for you to look up save my marriage on the internet.

Finding Peace Within Your Marriage

Carol Ann — Sun, 28 Feb 2010 10:36:21 +0000

So you got married and everything was perfect. Your spouse could do no wrong, everything that he or she did was cute and adorable. Then one day these cute and adorable acts aren’t what they used to be. You begin to get slightly annoyed at them. Eventually, some time down the road, these annoyances can escalate and cause serious trouble in your marriage.

You have worked hard at your marriage, to keep you and your spouse happy and well adjusted. You will not want to ruin all that you have because of an annoyance, that at one time did not bother you at all. If you follow the tips provided below, you will be able to calming manage these annoyances before they turn into a tsunami.

1. Keep It In Perspective- Little things can be overlooked. Your spouse is not perfect but neither are you, so try to focus on all the wonderful ways that your spouse enhances your life.

2. Take A Breather- Sometimes it is difficult to think positively while you are heated mad. Instead of speaking right away, which will only come out as a nagging yell, take a breath. Remove yourself for the situation if you have to and take a few deep breaths. You will be surprised at how this will help you bring things into perspective.

3. Do Not Yell, SPEAK- If you find that you can not overlook something then you should sit and talk with your spouse. Do not talk of all the little petty issues just talk about what is causing you stress. Talking does not by any means refer screaming and yelling. You need to calmly state what the annoyance is and try to come up with a solution to the problem that both of you can live with.

4. Do Things To Build Your Relationship- Many people don’t realize the value of taking time out of the day to to bond with each other. Participate in a shared interest, go to dinner, or plan a romantic getaway. You will find that your spouse annoys you less when you feel attached to them.

5. Make Jokes- It is okay occasionally to use humor when dealing with your spouse. There is nothing wrong with making light of something that they do that annoys you, that is as long as your spouse has a sense of humor. You will most likely find that by turning it into a joke it will diffuse the issues you are having and put it in a whole new light.

It is important to remember that living with anyone day after day can be stressful, but that dealing with the humanness of each other is the key to a healthy and happy marriage.

If you are having marriage problems and feel that you will need couples therapy in order to get you on the right track again, there is another method that is just as effective, will cost you less and can be done done in the privacy of your home. To learn about about the program, today, log onto www.lightyourfire.com.

Top Five Reasons to Get Marriage Counseling

newly wed guide — Fri, 11 Dec 2009 03:46:08 +0000

Whether you’re having problems in your marriage or just want to communicate better, marriage counseling can be one of the best ways to do this. A counselor can provide an objective ear and advice for couples who are struggling in their relationship and even for those who are doing fine, but want to ensure they don’t encounter any deep-seated problems in the future.

There are a number of reasons to get marriage counseling; in this article we’ll look at five of the top reasons you may want to look into marriage counseling, or at least couples counseling.

One, marriage counseling can not only acts as a form of healing for troubled marriages; it can also act as a preventative measure for many large problems that may loom in a couple’s future. Whether or not you feel you need it, marriage counseling is worth looking into if you’re having problems in your marriage, or even if you’re a couple simply looking to cement your relationship more before you marry.

Two, marriage counseling can help couples find a number of workable solutions that may help their marriage. From infidelity to simple communication problems, a good therapist can help you figure out how to beat the odds and begin to heal your relationship.

Three, it is always helpful to have the ear of someone objective and distanced from your problems. Friends and family members may make good comforters and sounding boards, but they are necessarily biased. An objective therapist sees both sides and attempts to work with you to reconcile them.

Four, you married the person you’re with because you loved them; no matter what they’ve done, it’s worth trying at least once to save. To this affect, a therapist can help you determine how much your vested, and indeed, whether you truly want to be with or without them.

Five, if you have children, marriage counseling offers an alternative option to immediately divorcing or separating. While some marriages simply don’t work and won’t no matter what, an equal number suffer from misunderstandings, lack of trust and numerous other obstacles; if you have children, these problems are compounded. Marriage counseling can be an excellent option for figuring out one, if you can save your marriage, and two, how to handle questions, concerns and problems your children may have.

Marriagemax.com is an alternative marriage advice website created and run by relationship expert Mort Fertel since 2004. It covers a broad range of marriage topics and offers advice and ideas for helping out your marriage.

For more information about any of the programs or to contact Mort Fertel, please go to http://www.marriagemax.com or call 410.764.1552.