There is little doubt that the relationships we have those we love are often the source of our greatest joys and our most painful heartaches.

Making the most of a romantic partnership — helping it grow, blossom, and flourish as time goes on — takes energy and effort. And even the happiest, most loving couples face time of uncertainty or adversity that threaten their relationship. Fortunately, professional help is available for couples who need it.

Regardless of whether you’re in a relatively new relationship that’s facing challenges which seem beyond your ability to resolve, your relationship seems filled with uncertainty, chaos, or strife, or your relationship has lost the spark it once had and your lives seem filled with nothing but the trivial and mundane, professional marriage counseling and couples therapy can help.

While couples and marriage counseling helps countless couples in innumerable ways each and every day, the following are seven reasons you and your partner may want to consider couples therapy:

1. Resolve Inaccurate Assumptions and Misconceptions — We all come from different backgrounds and have differing beliefs about how a relationship is supposed to work. When partners are unaware of their own underlying assumptions and/or don’t share them openly with each other, frustration is likely to follow. Relationship counseling can help both partners come to terms with their different relationship values so they can avoid making inaccurate assumptions and work together to meet each other’s needs.

2. Better Express Your Feelings — Learning how to express our feelings in a way that is respectful and assures they’re understood is a valuable skill in any relationship, and is especially important when communicating with our significant others. All too often, partners express themselves in ways that seem aggressive or hurtful, or they don’t express their feelings at all. Couples counseling can help you find ways of expressing yourself that make sure you’re heard and understood while remaining open to how your partner feels.

3. Develop Problem-Solving Skills — A large amount of relationship stress can be attributed to everyday problems that occur outside the immediate sphere of the relationship. Professional concerns, financial issues, and problems concerning our extended families are just a few examples of situations that can lead to unnecessary stress between partners. Couples therapy can help you can your partner learn problem-solving and coping skills so that you can face problems together as opposed to taking them out on each other.

4. Overcome Feelings of Detachment — Given all of the demands on our time, from career, to kids, to family responsibilities and concerns, it can be all too easy to sacrifice the time our relationships need and deserve in order to deal with seemingly more pressing matters. Unfortunately, if we don’t give our relationships enough time and attention, we tend to become detached from one another. A couples therapist can work with you and your partner to prioritize your time and find ways of rekindling the attention and energy your relationship enjoyed at its outset.

5. Value Each Other’s Uniqueness — While you likely valued your partner’s unique personality quirks and traits when you first met, over time these same traits may go unappreciated or even become a source of frustration. Marriage counseling and therapy can help you and your partner relearn to appreciate all the things about each other that make you the unique individuals you each fell in love with.

6. Improve Your Communication — Real estate may be all about location, location, location, but our relationships are all about communication, communication, communication! While many issues may lead to relationship discord and strife, a lack of communication is almost always one of the critical problems. A couples and marriage therapist can help you and your partner learn the communication skills and tools necessary to refrain from saying hurtful things, avoid turning small disagreements into huge arguments, and generally be able to understand one another and work together to solve life’s challenges together.

7. Learn to Listen — While this could arguably be included under “Improve Your Communication,” it is important enough to warrant addressing on its own. All too often, we tend to assume we know what our partner is thinking or going to say and we “fill in the blanks” and keep moving. However, this lack of attentive listening is not only disrespectful, it is the source of many of the communication issues couples face. To make your relationship work, you not only need to be able to adequately express your own feelings but actively listen to your partner’s. As a Greek philosopher once commented, “We have been given two ears and but a single mouth, in order that we may hear more and talk less.” While this may be applicable to life in general, it is certainly true in our relationships and couples counseling can help you do just that.

Again, these are just seven reasons why couples in any committed relationship may want to consider marriage counseling or couples therapy. There are innumerable others.

However, perhaps the most important reason to consider couples counseling is that our relationships to a very great extent define who we are and how we feel about life. Shouldn’t you do everything in your power to make sure your relationship is the best it can possibly be?

To learn more about couples counseling, visit Sherrie Campbell’s website on depression counseling in Yorba Linda.