Most of us have a certain idea about what marriage counseling is all about – we usually always think of it as a modern idea, having grown out of the increase in divorces over the past years. Getting marriage counseling to most people would seem to indicate that the marriage is in some real trouble, and that getting counseling is a sort of last ditch effort to save it from disaster or divorce.
It is very unfortunate that we have developed this incorrent association. In the olden days, marriage counseling was not called marriage counseling – but it was still widely practiced, and usually occured before the actual marriage took place. Almost all religions, for example, have developed a sort of pre-marital counseling practice that is designed to help the couple develop clear and honest communication with each other and to be crystal clear about their intentions and goals with regard to the marriage. In modern marriage counseling, we do some of the same things – but they only usually happen after the marriage has begun to deteriorate and the problems have become worse.
The best time to actually start marriage counseling is early on – preferably before you even get married, or very early in the marriage, especially if either of you have some indication that you and your partner may need to improve on your communication skills. Communication breakdown is the most common reason for failure in marriages and relationships. Unfortunately, we also have created a negative association with the idea of marriage counseling.
Many people are afraid that if they bring up the subject up, it will be interpreted by others in the wrong way. This is a common mistake. Recognising the need to improve a relationship or marriage, or to work on better communication, should not be taken to mean that the marriage is headed for disaster nor divorce. The simple fact is that marriage counselling is more effective when it is not used as a last ditch effort. It should be seen as something that can strenghthen the relationship and marriage and should be considered at the moment any problem starts to develop.
In fact, the one time that marriage counseling will not help is when one of the partners has already mentally or psychologically detatched himself from the partnership completely. At this point, individual counseling may be what is needed. In order for marriage counseling to be trully successful, both partners need to really be committed to working at it. They need to be there to enhance and improve the marriage rather than simply looking for a reason to leave it.
If you are at that point in your marriage, check the psychological association directory in your area for names our counselors. Another option is to ask around – ask friends, or your family doctor. Marriage counseling is not an easy or quick fix solution, but it can be a new beginning – and it is definitely worth your while. If you have trouble affording counseling, some communities have free or low cost counseling programs.
Related posts:
- Does Marriage Counseling Work Or Is It A Load Of Bull? According to statistics, the answer is yes; many couples can testify about the success of marriage counseling. Many couples counseling saved their marriage; people that really want to make it work, people that learn how to do the hard work to overcome problems and deal with pain, without asking if does marriage counseling work.Couple counseling [...]...
- When Should You Seek Couples Or Relationship Counseling? [youtube:1QA6-WOrfgQ;Professional Psychology Co.;http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1QA6-WOrfgQ&feature=related] After the early days of a relationship, couples ideally find themselves in a place that is defined by love, respect and admiration. But once you have committed to spending your life with someone, you need to do regular maintenance on your relationship and make sure that you are moving forward happily as one, [...]...
- Why Seek Marriage Counseling With so many marriages struggling with marital conflict and communication being a major cause of problems in a marriage it is no wonder that marriage counseling is in such demand.Couples often look to marriage counseling when they can no longer communicate with each other, when they are so frustrated that they no longer know what [...]...
- Licensed Marriage Counseling Denver / Depression Therapist & Life Coach Licensed marriage counseling Denver / Depression therapist & Life coach; 20+ years experience Metro Denver, Boulder, Broomfield, Louisville, Arvada, Thornton Westminster Golden Colorado.Welcome seeking marriage counseling, therapy for depression, or life coaching, is a very personal undertaking, I’m glad you’ve chosen to work with me. I am committed to working with you to achieve your goals. [...]...
- Marriage Counseling Can Help To Improve Relationships At the foundation of any marriage and family is a core relationship. Relationships can be difficult for many people – particularly when they are not comfortable communicating their feelings, when they feel unsettled when others are upset with them and when there are kids involved. For them, when there are challenges in the marriage, marriage [...]...
- Learn More About Each Other Through Pre Marriage Counseling In a survey of over 3,000 homes across 4 states, published by Scott Stanley for the Journal of Family Psychology (March, 2006), suggest that pre marriage counseling really does help couples deal with money issues. This survey showed that couples seeking marriage family counselors were 31% less likely to divorce than those who did not. [...]...
- Calgary Marriage Counseling Calgary marriage counseling centre is allowing couples to explore different ways to ensure a successful marriage. World renowned committed therapists are offering the best solution to every couple. New interactive forms are making the counseling easier and more attractive. Calgary marriage counseling is presenting professional and experienced therapists really committed to keep families together. Their [...]...
- 3 Reasons to Avoid Marriage Counseling People are starting to become more aware of the pitfalls and dangers of marriage counseling. I personally cannot think of a more misleading group of so-called professionals. Just the other day I met an individual who told me the marriage counselor she and her husband were seeing was wonderful. I was surprised and told her [...]...
- All The Secrets Behind Pre Marriage Counseling Almost all therapists are strongly recommending pre marital counseling. Getting married without pre marriage counseling can be risky; the couple’s goal is to be really happy in the long run. Professional, skill based pre marriage counseling reduce the risk of divorce and lead to a happy marriage; it can also reduce the stress of the [...]...
- Is Marriage Counseling For You Marriage counseling has arguably become a rite of passage for modern American couples. Social conservatives lament such facts are proof that the social fabric has frayed considerably while others view such developments as a positive sign that everyone is owning up to reality at last....